2016 Year End

As 2016 comes to an end I reflect on what this year has brought and taught me.  I don’t think that anything in life comes as planned.  We all make goals for ourselves and set ourselves out to be the very best we can be, but sometimes those goals do not pan out the way we intended them too.  This year my husband and I set out to run at least 1000 miles and participate in our first ultra marathon; a 50k at Silver Falls State Park.  We ran the Cascade Half Marathon in January and ran many miles with our friends from ZaoFit and explored more trails at Silver Falls to train for the 50k.  I had fallen once at a training run at Silver Falls and bruised my tailbone which set me back a couple weeks, but no one could prepare me and my family for the ultimate setback I was about to face in June.  I ran the 30k race at Run For The Hills on June 5th, then five days later I was being rushed by ambulance to the hospital with what we learned a few hours later was a stroke.  I am still in shock that this ever happened.  It’s been almost 7 months now, and no one could have prepared me for what I faced this year.  I thought I would run and enjoy the great trails Oregon has to offer, become an ultra marathon runner and continue to influence and inspire others towards a healthy lifestyle.  My dream to become an ultra runner did not happen this year (but it did for Chris, yay!!!), nor will it happen in 2017, but just because this set me back does not mean I cannot become an ultra runner one day.  Just because I suffered a stroke does not limit my potential.  Over the past 6 months I have become impatient, frustrated, and sad that I cannot do what I once could, but I have also learned to become more grateful for all that I do have.  I am still alive and kick’n and can continue to be an influence on others.  I hope to continue to inspire and influence others on my journey to recovery, through leading a healthy lifestyle, and bringing hope to my students and their families.  I love my job and the opportunity I have to connect with others; being an Orange Mud Ambassador has been so much fun and I can't wait to continue doing more for the best trail running company out there; I love my family and watching Chloe grow into this amazing little girl and continuing to watch Chris be an amazing father and husband that wants to do nothing more than make us happy. While 2016 may not have been all that I asked for, it has given me everything that I needed to make me into a stronger woman, friend, counselor, daughter, wife, and most importantly a mother. I hope you all are thankful for what you have and continue to use your strengths to inspire others. Thank you 2016 for all you’ve given me and bring it on 2017!  Happy New Years everyone! Let's make 2017 amazing!

6 Months Post Stroke

Being flown to OHSU

It’s been 6 months today that I had my stroke.  It’s been a journey this last half of the year.  My life was turned upside down when I became dizzy and numb all of the sudden that early morning on June 11th.  I could no longer walk, couldn’t talk, and couldn’t breath.  It was the scariest time of my life and my families.  So many thoughts came through their heads about what was happening to me.  I don’t remember thinking anything but “what is wrong with me?!?!” I had no choice but to leave my trust and faith into the doctors to help save me and get me back to health.  It’s crazy to think that this was me 6 months ago!!  I mean seriously, I had a stroke?!?!  

At my worst, but in good care

Today I am mostly back to normal in terms of living my daily life, working, and being a mom, wife, daughter, and friend to my all of my friends and family.  I am still unable to run and exercise like I used to, but I am slowly getting there.  I still experience weakness on my left side.  My lower left leg and foot are almost constantly tingly and somewhat numb.  My upper left is still sensitive to cold and hurts still even when rain drops hit my arm.  I am used to it, but it’s still annoying. I do exercise and have been run/walking for 2 miles for a while now, but I’m usually in pain the next day and often lightheaded.  

An evening run

My left leg also gives out on me often if I do anything more than a shuffle.  So imagine trying to run on a trail again with technical terrain….I’d fall flat on my face! Only hiking for now. I started seeing a new physical therapist here in Salem that is well known in the stroke world and has so much expertise with stroke patients and especially those that are young and active (Northwest Rehabilitation Associates).  He’s got me running in the pool on an underwater treadmill doing HIIT workouts.  I’m not sure how long I’ll be going since it’s out of my insurance network and I have pay out of pocket.  I will go back to Kaiser and see the physiatrist and another PT and see if they can do more, but I doubt they can do what this other guy can do with his facilities and expertise.  We will see what happens!!  It’s hard to make any fitness goals because I just don’t know what I can do safely, but for now my goal is to keep at it and continue getting better!  I’m itching to do a trail run in the Spring, but I don’t think I’ll be ready.  Slow and steady, I need to remember, but I’m finally feeling more hope with this new therapist.  I only wish I found him sooner! Chris and I have been taking advantage of our mostly mild fall with short runs/walks in the park with Chloe and Rogue.  He is getting huge!! Can’t wait to be able to really run with him for a long run.  We are still representing our favorite trail running gear company Orange Mud and are thrilled to be a part of their team....they also have some great deals right now too, so be sure to check them out! They are definitely helping me in my recovery in keeping me motivated and hopeful I will be running on the trails soon.  

We celebrated Chloe turning 2!!!  Seriously, how do they grow so fast!  She’s thriving everyday and sings her ABC’s and can count to 20 now while she does “pull ups”! She amazes us every day.  We are so thankful for each and every day and I still can’t thank everyone enough for your support this year!  I still haven’t finished my thank you cards, and I apologize for that...I will eventually get to them all!  But please know how much you all mean to me!  We hope you all have a wonderful Christmas this holiday season and hug your loved ones!  Cheers!

Silver Falls 50k Recap

This last Saturday on November 5th, we set out at 5:30 in the morning to Silver Falls State Park to participate in the Silver Falls 50k.  This is the race we had both wanted to do earlier in the year, then my plan was sabotaged when I suffered from a stroke 5 months ago.  During the summer Chris was not sure if he wanted to do the race since I could no longer run, but I encouraged him to still run...I even got our friends Julie and Jerry to run too :)  I signed up to volunteer at the race and still be part of the festivities and experience a 50k through my husband, friends, and fellow runners.  There were many times that Chris, Jerry, and Julie all thought they might not run due to a variety of reasons, but indeed they were there at the starting line on a crisp November morning.  

Volunteering early in the morning

Julie at mile 9.6

Chris was using his endurance pack from Orange Mud.  While he was preparing, though, a small pinhole was in his bladder that was leaking.  Nothing would hold the small leak, but since it would be raining anyways, he decided to deal with it. As the gun set off, I was still busy getting runners their race packets as they prepared for their marathon, and few 50k stragglers that barely missed the start time.  I then offered to help at an aid station and good thing I did, cause the van with the goods didn’t know where to go.  I had picked up another volunteer and headed to the youth camp aid station.  The van with the goods did not know to go through a shut gate, but we indeed found a way and barely had our table set up in time for the first few runners.  This was fun seeing the runners early in the race (mile 9.6) and enjoying themselves.  Unfortunately our station somehow did not get any Heed or gels, but luckily it was early enough in the race I knew they would be okay till the next aid station at mile 14 who was sure to have all the goods. My husband and friends were surprised to see me here and it was fun to see their smiling faces.  They were feeling good and enjoying the beautiful trails.  I left my fellow volunteers as the rain began to set in and headed to the next aid station to cheer on everyone and “crew” them with their special needs that they had packed in their drop bags.  

I saw Chris and Jerry turn the corner into the aid station and still looking good.  They had crossed a river 2 miles prior so I thought Chris may want new socks, but he was good.  He was still fine with his pack and hadn’t noticed a leak from the bladder.  They quickly took their energy gels and water and headed out.  I soon saw Julie and she looked good.  She was REALLY hungry and wanted her PB and J so I assisted her and got her the fuel she needed.  She also had a couple caffeine pills, which she took, and later learned this was not the best idea (more on that coming up). I wouldn’t see anyone again until mile 24, so I headed back to the finish, warmed up with some yummy chili and coffee and congratulated our friend Olivia for completing the tough 7 mile race.  She and her friend did a great job and enjoyed the beautiful falls on their run.  I was also hoping to see our friend Tonya, but she finished and left because she hit her head while going under one of the falls and fell flat on her back.  She was okay, but needed stitches; ouch!! I checked in at the volunteer tent to see if the needed anymore help.  I told them I was headed to the North Falls to meet my friends and brought along more fuel for the runners.  I had estimated to see everyone between 12 and 12:30, so I had some time and rested my eyes a bit in the car.  I went back to the checkpoint and took a short jog (.2 miles) to a waterfall to enjoy the sights while I waited.  

I came back and continued to wait with other spectators, finding shelter under the bridge.  It was getting closer to 12:30 and I hadn’t seen anyone yet.  Chris had sent me a text about an hour and half earlier saying he was cramping up at mile 17, so I knew he was struggling.  Finally I saw Jerry.  He looked good and continued on.  Chris was no longer with him, so I waited for him.  I was maybe expecting him to only be no more than 10 minutes behind, but he still wasn’t there.  I knew he was hurting earlier, so maybe he dropped out a few miles back.  I didn’t have service anymore, so I couldn’t communicate with him, so I continued to wait.  Finally, around 1pm I saw Chris coming down the trail. He had been cramping a ton in his calves and was being cautious as he continued in the race.  I gave him some company for a few short minutes down the trail, then away he went.  He was nervous about not making the cut off time, but he was safe with 30 minutes to spare.  

I still hadn’t seen Julie, so I stuck around.  I figured she wouldn’t be too far behind Chris, but time continued to go on and I still hadn’t seen her.  I hiked up the trails a bit in hopes of seeing her run down the trail, but no sign of Julie.  The cut-off time came and went and I had to make the decision to head back to the finish.  I just didn’t want to leave without making sure she was okay...I would’ve felt so bad if she had come through and I wasn’t there with her stuff, but I knew that if she did there were others still there to help and sweepers would be coming through soon.  I just hoped that she was okay. I got a text from Chris saying he was around the South Falls with only 4 more tough miles to go.  I waited around the finish line looking for Jerry and Julie, but didn’t see them.  I just had to hold out hope they were all okay.  I knew Chris would be coming down soon, so I went to the bottom of their last hill and at last, I saw him!  I walked/jogged with him for a ¼ mile to the finish.  He did it!!! He was now an ultra runner!  He said he was cramping since mile 17 and had struggled along the way.  He said his calves were super tight at one point and fell down.  Other fellow runners helped him out and rubbed his calves and gave him salt tablets.  He was sore, but happy and proud he did it!! The thing I love about runners, especially trail runners, is that they are always so helpful.  Chris received help with his calves and Julie gets another person’s shirt!  How awesome is that!!  

Runners provide such a fantastic community through support, encouragement, and fellowship.  I’m so happy to still be part of it!  Many people have asked me if I was bummed that I couldn’t run this race and if it was hard to be there and not be in the race.  My answer, ABSOLUTELY NOT!! I enjoyed myself along the way.  From checking runners in, providing fuel and aid to others, and most importantly being a cheerleader was awesome!!  I was happy to be part of the event and experience my first 50k ultra race through my husband, friends, and fellow runners.  I was so excited for all those who were able to run today and even more excited for those who finished.  What an accomplishment for everyone!!  This was a fantastic event and hope to be part of it again in the future...hopefully running :) Thanks especially to Orange Mud for letting us represent you and for providing an awesome product for Chris to run with. 

Oh and the best part, since the race, I haven’t had a headache or felt lightheaded...the first time in 5 months at work!! A co-worker told me, “it’s because you had your nature, fresh air, and were in your element over the weekend”.  I think there is some truth to that.  I am blessed to be able to enjoy the wonders of our world and be part of an amazing community.  Looking forward to more beautiful moments throughout my life!

He's an Ultra Runner!

Nice work guys!!

Nature Walk

We enjoyed a little jaunt at a nature park in West Salem yesterday.  We took Chloe for a little walk and I jogged for like a minute with Rogue.  Chris took him out longer.  I wish we had longer trails closer to home around here, but for me right now this is perfect! 

He's back

Chris is back on and will run the 50k race on November 5th!  We will work out a system to help me out with Chloe and the puppy.  Also Chris will be starting a new adventure in his career journey and will start an apprenticeship in HVAC in a couple weeks.  Another change for our family but we will cope and work out a system.  But for now Chris is back on track! 

Still learning to adjust

I've been back to my job officially now for 2 weeks at the high school and am continuing to learn to adjust to my new normal.  Each day I struggle with doing what I want to do versus doing what I can do.  This has been a learning and reflection process for both me and Chris.  I worked the first week and helped with the cross country team for 1 day, then was completely exhausted and wiped out over the weekend.  The start of the second week of school, I began to have some tingling sensations in my left arm.  I was not experiencing any other symptoms, so I knew I was "okay" but I also knew I wasn't resting enough.  I checked in with my doctor and just as I was going to start doing, they told me to cut back my hours and rest more.  

I have made the big girl decision to begin putting myself first a bit more (this is SO hard!).  I have cut out coaching cross country.  This was saddening as running is my passion.  It's hard enough to not be able to run again (yes I took a few steps back and am no longer running) but now I can't even help coach.  Yes, you read right, I'm not running the little bit that I was anymore.  I was not letting myself rest enough, so exercise has not been happening like I would like it too...again super hard to let go.  Everyone has been super supportive and understanding, but it is still hard to accept my new reality.  I am learning to leave work early to take a nap and rest.  I've cut back 1 hour, but I know it needs to be more.  I haven't been good about letting Chris do more around the house, but we're getting there.  

Rogue at 6 weeks old

Orange Mud will always be with us

He is making more adjustments to help me rest and not be stressed, which leads to the next thing that was cut out.  

Chris has decided not to race the 50k this November as time has been the enemy.  He is still running when he can, but the time needed to train for a 31 mile trail race can be tricky.  This is true for anyone, but with my health condition it adds on more.  Chris has been the best husband a girl can ask for and continues to do so much for me and Chloe.  He knows I need to rest more, so he's doing more around the house and helping with Chloe.  For someone with ADD, this only helps him, right :)  There's always plenty to do around here.

Rogue got tired on our walk

The other thing that is taking up more time for us is that we took home a new puppy 3 weeks ago!

Building the fence

We now have 9 week old German Shepard named Rogue.  Chris has wanted one forever, and we just couldn't pass up the opportunity that was presented to us.  So while I don't know that this was the perfect time to get a new puppy, it's still worth it.  And when is there ever a perfect time for anything!  Chris, his brothers and step-dad built a fence in one weekend and we got Rogue all the fixings a puppy needs.  He is just like any other puppy...chewing and biting everything and pooping and peeing in the house.  I'm definitely over cleaning up after him, but I know it's only temporary.  He has adjusted well to his new home and Chloe and DC (kitty) are also adjusting to him.  Chloe seems to like him, but not when she is tired and taking all of her toys :)  

Jeff helping Chloe clean

Fence is up!

We've enjoyed some friend time with our friends from California over Labor Day weekend.  We showed them a few of our favorite places in Salem and the state fair.  This was nice to see them, we miss them so much!  

Life is still good and we are SO thankful and blessed for all of the things given to us.  It's hard to accept the things that life throws at you sometimes; whether it's a health condition, a job, injury, etcetera.  However, I believe we are all given these "tests" for one reason or another.  I have learned more in the last 3 months the importance of a support network, letting others help you, and know that it's okay to put yourself first sometimes. 

Chloe and Rogue playing together

<3 my family                  

                 

Adjusting to the new normal

Summer has quickly come to an end.  Summer never seems long enough, but it was especially short this year with my stroke.  It is still surreal to know that it was only a little over 2 months ago that I was in the hospital and couldn't even walk.  I have made huge progress in a short amount of time, and again so thankful for everything!  I can walk, run, practice yoga, drive, do almost all of the things I used to be able to do 2 1/2 months ago, but it is still a new normal.  I still get tired quicker, light headed and headaches off and on.  My body constantly reminds me that I'm not like I used to be.

McKenzie River Trail

On August 8th I returned to work.  It was a transition getting back to work, but overall it went smoothly.  I met with my students last week, which was great, but it was also very tiring.  I began getting headaches again for a week straight, so working on my exercises didn't happen as frequently.  Luckily I have this week off to recoup again before the school year officially starts next Monday for us. 

I have ran a couple more times with our Zao Fit friends.  I thought I would try to bump up my length of intervals and tried a mile on with a few minutes rest then another mile.  Felt great and I wasn't burnt out, but the next day was when my headaches returned.  Trying to run/exercise more and working full days was too much on my brain and body, and it told me!  I still went to yoga, cause I love it, but took it real easy.  

This past weekend we took a little weekend getaway to the McKenzie River for some mountain fun.  I did only hiking...well I won't lie, jogged a couple minutes here and there.  I mean you can't bring me to a trail and expect me to not run on it!  But I was good :)  We hiked along the McKenzie River Trail for 3 miles one day and the next day we hiked the Sahalie and Koosah Falls loop trail...about another 3 miles.  We enjoyed the scenery, talked with other fellow hikers, and embraced the beauty around us.  We also kayaked on Clear Lake for a couple hours.  I just love being in the mountains and enjoying God's beauty.  It was literally a breath of fresh air for us after everything.

Sahalie Falls

Chris is continuing to run and begin bumping up his mileage to train for the Silver Falls 50k.  I REALLY wanted to try and take a leap and at least do the 7 miler, but I let my ego go and signed up to volunteer instead.  No need to reverse my progress!!  It's been really hard for me not running and working out like I want to be.  Whenever I think I can do more, I pay for it the next week.  I have to get used to a new normal for me.  I only hope that I can run like I used to and be able to run my first ultra marathon someday.  I have high hopes that maybe in fall 2017 I might be able to, but it could be 2018 by the time I am healthy enough to put in the strength needed to train.  In the meantime, I'll coach Chris :)  

He's also been having to adjust to the new normal as well.  I was the one that got him into running 6 years ago and have ran with him on most of our runs since then.  So in sum it sucks for both of us to not have me run.  I will try to hop on the bike soon with Chloe on the back and go with him that way, but I need to feel comfortable first.  I've been on the bike once around our house for 3 miles, up hills...it was tiring, but balance was fine.  He's been doing well though in keeping up with his runs.  There are days when he knows I'm super tired so he will stay home with Chloe so I can rest, but he gets in a good long run each week.  I'm so glad we have Jerry and Julie to help run with him...which they also signed up for the Silver Falls 50k :)  Chris continues to love his endurance pack from Orange Mud.  He drinks all 70 oz. on any long run.  I was able to use my single barrel pack while hiking this weekend too...felt like home :)  (here's a discount code if you want to try out some Orange Mud AB151-95)

We're still adjusting to life after a stroke, but continue to live well and enjoy life.

Clearlake

Koosah Falls

Kayaking at Clearlake